Bud and Jim were a couple of Newfie drinking buddies who worked as airplane mechanics in Gander,NFLD. One day the airport was fogged in and they were stuck in the hangar with nothing to do. Bud said, "Man,
I wish we had something to drink!"
Jim says, "Me too. Y'know, I've heard you can drink jet fuel and get a buzz.
You wanna try it?"
So they pour themselves a couple of glasses of high octane hooch and get completely smashed. The next morning Bud wakes up and is surprised at
how good he feels. In fact he feels GREAT! NO hangover! NO bad side effects.
Nothing!
Then the phone rings...It's Jim.
Jim says, "Hey, how do you feel this morning?"
Bud says, "I feel great. How about you?"
Jim says, "I feel great, too. You don't have a hangover?"
Bud says, "No, that jet fuel is great stuff no hangover, nothing. We ought to do this more often."
"Yeah, well there's just one thing..."
"What's that?"
"Have you farted yet?"
"No....."
"Well, DON'T, 'cause I'm in TORONTO!!!"

So these 2 Newfies go to Toronto looking for work. They walk into the UI office and the first guy goes in.

The lady says what do you do and buddy says "I'm a pilot!" The lady says great. Take this note over to the airport and you'll be making $100,000 per year.

He runs out and tells his buddy the great news. Well the second guy goes in and excitedly tells the lady he is a woodcutter. She says that there isn't much use for a woodcutter in Toronto. He says what about that great job me buddy got. She tells him "that's differnt, he's a pilot." Well the second fella loses it and says " He can't friggin' well pile it if I don't cut it!"

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